Administrative Sparkle Blog

It’s December, we’ve fattened up during Thanksgiving, being grateful for the things and people we have received in our life. Christmas, we’re in the throes of giving; extending love, joy, and peace to all. When you think about it, starting new habits doesn’t nearly start in January. These are qualities that we start beginning in November, habits that inspire us how to begin a new year, to extend a grateful attitude in receiving and a generous attitude giving without the expectation of something in return.

That is what networking is all about.

I believe that people, at our core, are inherently generous. If they can help, they will. If they know you, trust you, and like you, they will want to help you. Also, in giving, you open yourself to opportunities to receive when you need it. That is why networking is so important. It’s not just that you need others to get information, resources, or opportunities to help you get where you want to go, but they are looking for people who introduce them to those things as well.

In any relationship there is give and take. The most obnoxious people are those who always seem to be asking for favors and needing something. On the flip side, the most pathetic people are the ones who don’t know when to say “no,” or the “doormat.” They are both impossible relationships to maintain or tolerate. First you have the self-absorbed friend or contact, and the other is the needy, insecure, seeking constant reassurance and value as a person. Both extremely high-maintenance and exhausting. Although they do make a perfect match for each other. They meet each other’s most essential needs, but for the person who is secure in who they are, these relationships are time consuming and constantly laden with expectations and agendas. Run! With the first, at some point, you will start to feel taken advantage of and used. With the second, you will feel that you have to constantly validate the person.

As I said, I believe that most people want to help, but don’t want to be taken advantage of or feel it is a one-way street. We also want to be “open” to receive, but don’t want to feel that we “owe” someone. The right relationships do neither. There is no agenda, no expectation, just that the relationship is reciprocal and non-opportunistic. It’s genuine in both its giving and receiving.

As long as your networking and relationship development is with integrity and your intentions are meant to have relationships with like-minded people who are moving in the direction you want your life to go, it sounds like you have a healthy idea of what networking and relationship-building is. Now bring your networking and relationship building skills up a notch. Find out who they are, what they like, and what their goals and dreams are. You will never be at a loss for moments to give when you can and ask when need.

This could be a really great year for you to meet and develop some really fantastic people. Make a list of what you like and the kind of people you would like to meet and then get out there. Pick up your local city event magazine or online and start getting out there to places you love or places you’ve wanted to try. Sounds like there would be a lot of people who like the same things as you. And, well, that’s a start.

Give me your thoughts on networking and developing relationships. Tell me what you think. Tell me what you think are the most important qualities in relationships and friendships.